jessica

on sunday night Jessica (11) also threw a huge tantrum. she was here in the office building watching tv in the dining room, which is actually completely forbidden....but everyone makes exceptions for her. she is the deaf/mute girl and its impossible to control her anyway, she basically does what she wants. since she goes to a boarding school during the week, she is only here on the weekends and somehow there is no way to punish her for not doing what she is supposed to. Her center of life is supposed to be her boarding school, and the hogar is just supposed to be a help to the school, but that has been changing, her center of life is the hogar now. partly because her sister is now here, i guess. also, because we've been taking sign courses, she can communicate better with the tias, she is a little bit less of an outsider.

anyway, at 9 pm Tia Flor came to turn off the tv and send her to bed, but she freaked out and locked herself into the Sala de Estudio. So Tia Flor had to get the keys from the director to unlock the room. Jessica then escaped and went outside, where she then wandered around in the pouring rain and tried to test whether she fits through the bars of the fence to escape.

It took 3 people to forceably drag her into the building, then she was kicking and screaming on the floor. She can't talk, but she can make sounds, when she crys she makes a weird moaning/howling sound. They couldn't really move her, so they just held her down on the floor, hoping that she would get tired out and calm down. After about half an hour I didn't hear her anymore, so I guess they had taken her back to the house.
But a few minute later, she was out front again, this time only in her socks, standing in the rain. Then she took off her socks and was running around barefoot. They called an ambulance and got 2 paramedics to take her inside again. They said that her symptoms were typical of a nervous breakdown and took her to the hospital. There they said that it's possible that she has schizophrenia, but didn't want to give her any drugs because of her age. In any case, they need to get her checked out, they have found a neurologist who speaks sign language. Obviously,, her treatment is going to be expensive and the Hogar will have to pay for it. Which is really bad timing because at the moment the Hogar is going through a financial crisis...more on that later.

Last week she was in such a good mood and really well behaved. She had just won a gold medal in some Special Olympics in Santiago, in running, and was super nice to everyone. Generally though, she is badly behaved. You can't yell at her because she can't hear, and if she wants to ignore you she just looks away, then you can't communicate with her at all anymore.

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tantrums

Sometimes I have to do things that I don’t like. For example, a couple weeks ago the Tia was gone, accompanying Ceci to the hospital. I was trying to get all the younger ones bathed. I asked Camila (7) several times to get ready for her shower, but while I was looking for her towel, she put her pajamas on instead. I gave her a chance to take off her pajamas, but she wouldn’t do it, so I had to do it for her. Then she started crying, which eventually turned into a full-on flipout session as I pulled her up the stairs to the bathroom. She was refusing to get in the shower and even once she was in she kept shrieking and fighting with me and flailing her arms around. Carolina had to help me, holding her arms down so that I could shower her and wash her hair. Forceably showering crying little girls is not something I had in mind when I came here.

It happens every once in a while, sometimes she starts crying uncontrollably for really no reason at all and doesn’t calm down for a long time, sometimes hours. Usually at some point she starts screaming for her mother, which is so horrible to hear because her mother is never going to be there for her. Sometimes the older girls yell at her, "Shutup, stupid! Your mom is not here!" Something is going on with her, they were going to take her to a psychologist, but it’s gotten a lot better recently.

The other girls say that Linda (7) also has her tantrums, where she gets violent and starts scratching the tias. I have never seen her in that state though, so I guess she has gotten better as well.

Maria (9) has been acting weird lately, refusing to do her work in study hall. It’s as though she flips a switch. For no reason, she refuses to do anything, goes completely stiff, we can’t even move her because she grabs on to tables and chairs and refuses to let go. If we try to carry her out of the room she starts a crying fit and throws herself on the floor and makes a scene.

new post

Recently I decided to get out my summer shoes….pulled them out from the bottom of my closet and they were completely moldy. Nothing else in my closet is moldy, and I didn’t notice at all cuz the light down there is not too good. But there was no evidence of mold on the walls or anything. And my backpack was not moldy at all. Just the leather of my shoes. It was really gross and I've never seen anything like it. The photos don't do it justice.
It is pretty irritating, since it means I have to buy shoes now. The orange moccasins are irreplaceable and were a brand-new going-away present. The sandals I bought cheap in Pakistan. The Birkenstock were the best and most comfy, practical summer shoes, and expensive, but at least I can get them again back in Berlin. I don’t mind having to replace them so much because now I can buy them in the color that I actually wanted. :D





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We went to the theater to see some of our girls perform. All the special education schools of Temuco were present, each school had a short piece on stage. Three of our girls are in special ed, Jessica, who goes to the deaf/mute school, and Catalina and Cynthia. Jessica wasn’t performing, but Catalina and Cynthia were in a short “Flintstones” dance. Here are some photos:

Catalina is standing behind the wheelchair, she was "Betty" from the Flintstones. Cynthia is the white bird in the middle.

Cynthia and Catalina after the performance. They are both 13 years old. Cynthia has a growth problem, she is very small for her age. They don't know much about her condition, apparently her aunt had the same thing and died in her 30's.

my photo site is currently full, so i am not uploading fotos right now, i have to rent more webspace.